New Horizons

One of the many things that attracted me and my husband to each other was our desire to be entrepreneurs.  He has been in business for himself for over 30 years, some years were good some not so much.   Me, on the other hand have not stayed so focused….I have had several business ideas and even a few businesses but I was never able to stay interested past the “lean” years.  I would like to say that I am business owner material but maybe I’m not, or maybe I just haven’t found the one thing that makes me want it bad enough.  Even with all of this I am going to give it another try, I think my past experiences haven’t been so successful because I was juggling too many hats…mom, wife, friend, employee and most recently grandmother.  Now that I have put some of those hats on the back burner, I may have the energy and drive to pick the entrepreneur hat back up.  Stay tuned new things are on the horizon…..

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Why are Weekends so Short?

Seems like Friday takes forever but Monday comes in the blink of an eye!  Over Christmas and New Years my husband and I ended up with the flu, let me tell you neither of us has ever felt this bad.  I really thought I would need to get my affairs in order because the end was near!  Now a little background, my husband NEVER stays home and for the most part neither do I.  Especially when I just started a new job!  This was bad timing in every way.  After two visits each to the Dr and two visits each to the emergency we finally pulled through. We were back to our usual routine….living for the weekends!  

I try to make Friday night last forever!  I stay up as late as possible I want to savor the thought that I have two more day left.  Don’t get me wrong, I like my job, it’s a good job, but who really wants to work?  I work out of necessity, plain and simple!  That’s why I try to make the best of the weekend, Monday will be here before you know it!  I can’t wait for all of this snow and ice to melt away, let the top down on my convertible and drive off into the sunset with my husband at my side!  There is nothing better than shopping in little strip malls, eating in quaint restaurants, and just enjoying each other and our new found freedom!  

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Here we are at Union Station in St. Louis, this was a really fun trip we just got up one morning and decided to ride the train to Chicago and St. Louis was one of the stops!!

I’ve Been Here Before….

Now that my grandson Riley is staying with us at night Mon-Thur I live for Friday nights so I can relax and unwind from the week!  Don’t get me wrong I love him to pieces and to be honest he is not a bad kid at all.  By the time he get’s to my house he is pretty much sleep so I don’t have a lot to do.  Lately, he has been voicing to his mom that she needs to get a daytime job like the other moms at daycare!  My daughter has been looking but we all know the story, things are tight, budget cuts, no jobs blah, blah, blah but she is trying.  Meanwhile, Riley has started wetting the bed…I think he’s asleep when its happening but regardless its happening.  Now its been YEARS since I’ve had to deal with this and I am stressed.  The solution to this problem is for me to get up around 4 am and take him to the potty and by the time his mom gets there around 7:30 he doesn’t wet the bed.  Folks here is the problem….I am not used to getting up at 4 am for anything!  This is hard!  Last night I slept all through the night and sure enough it happened!  I told his mom not to punish him because I felt responsible.

Getting up at 4 am to take a 4 year old to the bathroom is a nightmare, he’s tired and doesn’t want to get up so there is crying and whining, tantrums and the whole bit!  Pure torture!  For ME!  But I guess that’s what grandmas are for.  We do all the things that mommies are too tired, too busy or too broke to do!  Here it is Friday night and I’m missing him just like I missed Juliet when she left.  It is definitely worth the loss of sleep and all the fighting just to spend time with him and to hear him say “I love you Grams, your the best.”

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I can’t believe how much he’s grown!!  I love you Riley, your the best! -Grams

And Then There Were Two…

So here it is, finally!  My first official blog!  I’m sure my friends will forever be grateful that I have a place to talk!!   

Here it is in a nutshell… my husband and I were married September 7, 2002 in a huge ceremony with all our friends and family…family included my 3 kids and his…well lets just say he had more than three.  Anyone that tells you a blended family is a breeze is nuts.  Lots of personalities, emotions, and belief systems.  It was a long struggle, some good, some bad, some ugly!   As the years moved forward children grew up, graduated from high school, went on the college, got married, had babies and so on…some even moved back home (temporarily of course)!  Then one day it hit me like a ton of bricks… THE LAST ONE IS GRADUATING IN MAY!!!  WOW!  Now, I will be the first to admit that starting a marriage with kids is HARD and it probably would have been so much easier had we done it the “right” way but I don’t think our relationship was meant to be that way.  My husband coming into my life when he did was a true gift from the Creator…don’t get me wrong he’s no angel… but he has been a wonderful provider, father, and husband.  

Ok, back to MAY!!  Harold (that’s my husband) has been in Juliet’s (that’s my youngest daughter) life since she was two so he is very much a father figure to her.   The thought of her leaving was bittersweet for both of us.  In the midst of all the senior activities time seemed to shift into overdrive!  Before we knew it it was time for her to leave!  Now the emotions I had when my oldest left for college were multiplied by 10!  This was my baby!  Oh boy DON’T CRY, DON’T CRY this was my mantra the whole day.  I was comforted by the fact that most of her friends would be attending college with her and it’s only 40 minutes away BUT that covered her…what about me?  I think you should know I am not the girl with tons of friends and an active social calendar, I’ve been a mother for 26 years and a wife for 12 I don’t have time for all of that!  I have exactly 2 friends from childhood and have accumulated 2 more in adulthood. That’s it people!  I have a total of 4 people that I would consider a friend.  Juliet and I have spent a lot of time together over the past 19 years!  She had become my shopping buddy, my biggest critic, my confidant, and my friend.  I was loosing that and I didn’t know how to process it.  

The day we dropped Juliet off at college was a Friday, I fought the desire to cry, kick, and scream!  I guess having Jessica (my oldest daughter with me) helped a bit.  We had to take two cars (she was in denial about the size of a dorm room), one with me and Jessica and one with my husband and his oldest son.  After getting her settled in she was anxious to get into all the activities the college had planned for that weekend, which translates into “Bye Harold and Mom”!  As we were leaving Lawrence I felt the sadness creeping up but Jessica and I talked all the way back and before I knew it I was home….now what?  Harold and I just wandered around the house, we made small talk and eventually he went to bed and I stayed up thinking and watching tv.  Then came Saturday …and so did the tears!  My stepson called to see how I was doing and I was unable to speak, he said he saw the look in my eyes the day before and he knew it was coming!  I cried so long and hard that I cried myself to sleep.

Days turned to weeks, weeks to months and I began to enjoy my time alone.  It was kind of nice have the house to myself, no teenagers coming and going, no curfew arguments, no asking to borrow my car!  I discovered that I could get up, go eat brunch, do a little shopping and not have to worry about a teenager with an attitude!  There’s no homework to help with, no getting up extra early to make sure she’s off to school, no staying up late until she comes home safe.  I could get used to this!  

The best part of all of this has been the uninterrupted time that I have been able to spend with the love of my life!  For the first time in our relationship it’s just the two of us in the house, we can spend lazy Saturday mornings together, we can have dinner at cafe’s and restaurants as late as we want, we can even jump in the car and take a road trip!  Maybe this isn’t going to be so bad after all…that is until Jessica called and asked if we would be willing to watch Riley (my 4 year old grandson) while she worked nights!  How can we say no?  Well I guess easily but I remember being a single mom and needing help so of course we said yes.  

Well it was fun while it lasted, we still have our weekends but Mon-Thur. we have a 4 year old “sleeping over”… and then there were THREE!

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Here we are at a New Year’s Eve party!  Our adventure is just beginning and we can’t wait to see what this new chapter brings our way!  Here we go……